Portsmouth Pride
Back in 2021 I came out as Pansexual and it was like a weight had been lifted off of me, it allowed me to be me, but there was still a lot of holding back… The feeling of wanting to be accepted by the people around you is very strong. There are still some feelings I have in regards to my older friends that hold me back, the concern of losing them after some have already distanced, but if they distance, are they friends anyway? However, this is about Pride, my first Pride ever, and my first Pride being out.
When I went to Portsmouth Pride I expected there to be a lot of rainbows, a lot of flags, with everyone showing what they are proud of… but the sheer size and scale was not what I expected. I arrived early with my partner and we picked up our bands for the VIP area, then settled down to watch Fabulous Josh on stage who was so great. Then the parade came in and it was like a rainbow bomb of happiness had just exploded all over the place. It was astonishing to behold, to watch people coming in, the joy and acceptance, the shared diversity of it all.
My partner spotted some hooded pups so popped on their fox hood, so we had some pet and handler time out in public, it felt so freeing, just being us. They wore it for the first half of the event, getting waved at by other pups, even having some kids come running up and asking them for a photo. It made me happy to see them happy, and to just see the amount of acceptance that there was for everyone.
The speeches that happened, in particular by Samo, were so touching, so deep and moving, it’s hard to explain the words when the words were pure emotion, feelings. I don’t tend to listen to politicians all that much, but Stephen Morgan made some good points.
After some time we took a short break and my partner covered me in blue, yellow, and pink glitter, then painted the pansexual flag on my cheek. We then went back. I felt so comfortable showing this side of me to anyone that I encountered, I felt happy, supported, safe, secure, comfortable, I felt at home being at Portsmouth Pride, and I wish it didn’t have to end.
So, my first Pride and it was an amazing experience that has left a lasting impression on me, one of being with the community. I want to go back, I want to go to other Pride events, and I want to actively be a part of it all however I can, and contribute in whatever way I can. It was the first time I felt comfortable in a large crowd and able to disregard the anxieties I have had around people. It has given me a sense of being and I am extremely proud of who I am and what I have, not become, but come to realise about myself through this journey of discovery. I am proud.
